Profiles in presence: JANET MCFARLANE

Interview with Janet McFarlane in her own words:

In less than a year, Janet McFarlane is making incredible use of the lessons learned in her TPPP Professional End-of-Life Doula training. Janet hails from Pendleton, OR and after living out of the country and state for over twenty years, found herself back at home to be close to her widowed mother.  Time moved on and Alzheimer’s disease set in. Becoming her mom’s primary caregiver, Janet had her in their home for the first few years, “until it became unsafe for her and I had to move her into Memory Care. This was the toughest decision of my life as her daughter.” Janet stayed very involved until her mother’s death in March of 2024. 

Spring led to summer and Janet suffered another major loss, the sudden death of her best friend Patrick. A few weeks after this tragedy, Janet received an email, likely from OR Rural Health, about an upcoming training for rural doulas.  “I thought about it, sat on it for about a week and felt ‘something’s telling me that this is the time’ (to take this training)”. Janet related:  “The training was amazing; it was hard, but it was so eye-opening, so full of ‘a-ha moments’, as well as my feeling ‘I wish I had known this, given this gift to my mom, and my dad twenty years earlier.”

During that summer’s Pendleton Round-Up, Janet visited with an old friend, Theresa Kramer, who was also very close to Patrick. They had made plans to get together and toast their dear friend. In conversation Janet shared about the EOL doula class she was taking, and her friend looked at her wide-eyed, asking which program Janet was going through . . . it turned out that this friend had signed up for the same training, in Bend! They believe that Patrick guided them to this, which truly solidified that Janet was just where she was supposed to be.

Since that time, Janet has taken this message to heart and in her work as a Community Health Outreach Coordinator for St. Anthony’s Hospital moved it into various sub-groups of her wider community.  Janet has given presentations about advanced care planning, advanced directives and the value of having a POLST to seniors in retirement facilities, houseless individuals in a shelter and veteran’s groups to name a few.  “We live with dignity. Why shouldn’t we also be able to die with dignity?” she asks. 

After three community women who cared for husbands with dementia asked the hospital for a support group, Janet became the facilitator. She shares with the group, “I’m not the expert, but I have been on this journey as well. We are all, in some way, connected. Group members say to each other, ‘you get it; these are my people who understand what I’m going through’. It’s been a wonderful opportunity bringing folks together for them to build relationships, some of which have carried on outside of the group, and creating a community that truly understands one another.” This group has a Zoom option for members who cannot leave their ill loved one to attend in-person. Recently members have asked for a grief support group, now in the planning phase, which Janet intends to offer as well. This is so exciting to see!

“I feel so strongly about how important this work is. Traditional Health Workers can bill for birth doulas . . . end-of-life should have as much importance.  I am all about continuing to educate, making talking about death a normal experience just like anything else. I’m so grateful for all that I learned in the training. . . coming to the Immersion Day (in-person) was life-changing.  Things shifted in me.  I want to go out like Johnny Appleseed and spread this message! I’m so glad to help push this out into the world.”

And indeed, Janet is doing just that!

JANET WITH HER MOTHER AND HER BEST FRIEND PATRICK